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| - Hung up A Global Take On Men vs Women
On a chain of beautiful deserted islands in the middle of nowhere,
the following people are stranded:
Two Italian men and one Italian woman.
Two French men and one French woman.
Two German men and one German woman.
Two Greek men and one Greek woman.
Two British men and one British woman.
Two Bulgarian men and one Bulgarian woman.
Two Japanese men and one Japanese woman.
Two Vietnamese men and one Vietnamese woman.
Two Irish men and one Irish woman.
Two American men and one American woman.
One month later, on these absolutely stunning deserted islands in
the middle of nowhere, the following things have occurred:
-One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman...
-The two French men and the French woman are living happily
together in a menage a trois.
-The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of
alternating visits with the German woman.
-The two Greek men are sleeping together and the Greek woman is
cooking and cleaning for them.
-The two British men are waiting for someone to introduce them
to the British woman.
-The two Bulgarian men took one look at the Bulgarian woman and
started swimming to another island.
-The two Japanese have faxed Tokyo and are awaiting instructions.
-The two Vietnamese men have set up a pharmacy, liquor store,
restaurant, and laundry, and have gotten the woman pregnant in
order to supply employees for their stores.
-The two Irish men divided the island into north and south and
setup a distillery. They do not remember if sex is in the picture
because it gets somewhat foggy after a few liters of coconut
whiskey. However, they're satisfied because the English aren't
having any fun.
-The two American men are contemplating suicide, because the
American woman will not shut up and complains relentlessly about
her body, the true nature of feminism, what the sun is doing to her
skin, how she can do anything they can do, the necessity of
fulfillment, the equal division of household chores, how sand and
palm trees make her look fat, how her last boyfriend respected her
opinion and treated her nicer than they do, and how her
relationship with her mother is the root cause of all her problems,
and why didn't they bring a damn cell phone so they could call 911 and
get them all rescued off this Godforsaken deserted island in the
middle of freaking nowhere so she can get her nails done and go
shopping. | | |
| - Mr. Lonely (Redz Funkymix) - for thous of you whom have not noticed, i never use xanga much, but i don't want to close it, cuz i like having this pg. i have a site on nexopia, my user name is .:alexuta:.
....in case you REALLY miss me!!! | | |
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| You Know You're Romanian When... |
You grew up on liver sandwiches.... and thought that was normal.
You make your own noodles.
You had to share a room until you were 21.
Everything you eat is savored in garlic and onions.
You try and reuse gift wrappers, gift boxes, and of course aluminum foil.
You are standing next to the two largest suitcases at the airport.
You arrive one or two hours late to a party - and think its normal.
All your children have nick names, which sound nowhere close to their real names.
You know someone with 20 kids
You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone's house.
You can fit 10 people into a Dacia.
Your parents never throw anything away and if you by some chance manage to get something to make it to the garbage can... it mysteriously appears back where it was again.
You have lace curtains.
You have lace tablecloths.
You have rugs covering every inch of your house.
You have or had rugs on your walls.
Your mom tells you you're too skinny even though your 30 pounds overweight.
You ever heard of 'stomach stew'.
Girls cant have boyfriends when they are 17 but they have to be married at 18.
You have curtains hanging across every doorway.
Your parents tell you not to care what your friends think but they won't let you do certain things because of what other 'frati' and 'surori' will think.
You know someone that married his girlfriend of 2 months.
Your mom is a doctor and force feeds you medicine for anything ranging from a headache, stomach ache to a stubbed toe.
Your house is full of Romanian medicine that is probably illegal here.
You and your friends have ever been kicked out of a restaurant or recreational park for being too loud or rowdy.
Your mom recycles plastic cups and paper plates, and sandwich bags by washing them.
You dont know how to use a dishwasher.
You have a vinyl tablecloth on your kitchen table.
You use grocery bags to hold garbage.
Your dad ever butchered a pig or lamb.
You keep leftover food in your fridge in as many numbers of bowls as possible.
Your kitchen shelf is full of jam jars, varieties of bowls and plastic utensils (Got free with some household items).
Going to the movies is a sin.
Your parents call you farm animals when you get them mad.
Your mom ever chased you with a rolling pin or a broom telling you to stop so that she could hit you.
Your dad ever told you to smack yourself over the mouth for being disrespectful.
You're twenty years old and your parents are trying to send you to Romoville to get you married cause your old.
Getting married at 18 is normal.
Getting married at 16 actually happens.
Your mom washes your clothing at 40.
A new tax being passed by the government is simply a cover up because the end of the world is really coming.
Asking if you can get a discount at a discount store on clearance items is normal and not embarrassing for your parents.
You don't use measuring cups when cooking.
You feel like you've gotten a good deal if you didn't pay tax.
You can only travel if there are 5 persons at least to see you off or receive you whether you are traveling by bus, train or plane.
You only make long distance calls after 11 p.m.
If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight.
When your parents meet strangers and talk for a few minutes, you discover you're talking to a distant cousin.
Your parents don't realize phone connections to foreign countries have improved in the last two decades, and still scream at the top of their lungs when making foreign calls.
You have bed sheets on your sofas so as to keep them away from getting dirty.
It's "normal" if your wedding has 600 people.
You dont know half the people at your wedding cuz your parents invited them.
You've seen the ground while inside the lavatory of a train.
You have mastered the art of bargaining in grocery shopping.
You walk out of the grocery store with no less then two packed shopping carts weekly.
You're proud to be Romanian - and you pass these jokes on to all your Romanian friends!
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| WHY DO MEN PMS?
You know you have it, DON'T deny it! what I don't get is WHY? No physical pain is happening to you, yet, you get moody, and snob ppl out!
Can someone explain WHY men PMS??!! Becasue I need an answer!! | | |
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